Mom is watching The Nutcracker ballet on TV. I am too. The remote is still a mystery to me. Although one time I did manage to record a Spanish soap opera by jumping on the buttons just right.
Mom says, “I love ballerinas.” and “I wish I were the SugarPlum Fairy.” and “Stop licking the remote.” I can’t help it. The remote tastes like gingerbread, for some reason….
Mr. Clark, my teacher at obedience school said, “A dog needs a boss and a job.” Mom is my boss, of course, and my job is to make people happy. I’m really good at that job. I have another job, too. It’s called sit-stay-down-come-heel-bring-it-leave-it-and-don’t-be-naughty. I may or may not be barely competent at that job.
My dream job has always been to work at a restaurant. I am totally qualified to do this job. I could be a sous chef and taste all of the food to be sure it’s perfect. Even though I occasionally eat goose poop and dirt, I’m sure I’d know a yummy steak if I ever tasted one. I could also be a dishwasher. I am a very skilled plate-licker.
Mom had the job of being a teacher and now she has the job of being an author. Mom LOVED teaching, and she says being an author is a blast. Every day she writes stories, revises stories, and submits stories to publishers. Nothing makes her as excited as an acceptance letter. She likes getting ideas, writing about them, seeing her name in print, seeing her books in the bookstore, and talking to kids about writing. She says, “I have had two dream jobs already!”
Mom’s other dream job has always been to be a ballerina. Anyone who knows her (EVERYONE who knows her) knows she is TOTALLY NOT qualified to do this job AT ALL. Sometimes Mom worries that she’ll be a one-book-wonder. She says, “If I don’t get an acceptance soon, I may be forced to look into this SugarPlum Fairy gig, after all.”
OMG, Mom. REALLY? Let’s forget her age, body structure, strength, balance, and natural grace. Has she ever had so much as one dance lesson in her entire life?? NO!
I don’t think she knows that some dreams are not meant to come true. So if she’s ever the SugarPlum Fairy, I will look into piloting fighter jets!